Friday, March 30, 2007

disapproval and exile

This post is on pause :)


Blogger Die Muräne said...

Hi Justine, it’s quite hard to write that all because my english is not really good and I’m not sure if I got it all right what you wrote…
Anyways, I think it’s great how you write things down to clear your head. I really admire that!

So let ME pray now ;)
I think your brother didn’t understand too well what he is reading (and teaching). Otherwise he would judge so much. Judge the world, you, himself - Projections.
(oh, did I just judge him... lol)But I know that’s not of any help for you. You can’t change him anyway, and you shouldn’t try to do that. You only can change your own point of view.

You write, you don’t want to loose the close relationship that you had with him. I just can tell you the story of me and my sister: we were very very close. Then, all of a sudden, I don’t even know how it happened, we walked on different ways. Everything got different. And even after some time when we tried hard to come close together again... it just didn’t work. We didn’t understand each other. Couldn’t accept each other in the fully way that was needed. But we didn’t reject each other. Just accepted that we’re different now(even thought we weren’t...). Sometimes we met and talked like we were strangers...
After about ten or even more years the differences disappeared without any effort. And we’re maybe closer now then ever... Don’t know what happened.
In my work with astrology I see so often, that people are not only very different. We all go through different phases in our life. If there is no match of this phases at a several time... there is nothing you could do. The harder you try to hold the old situation, the more you loose it. Hard but true!

So if you write: Don’t suggest me to reject him, your right. But what about just giving your relationship some more space? This has nothing to do with rejection, cause you still hold him in your heart. Show him your love, but don’t fight for him. Don’t fight for his sympathy. Don't try to share his opinion. Just trust and give it some space, and be patient.

Maybe I’m wrong, but I think you feel rejected yourself. When you feel like that, and unloved, and not ‘measuring up’or whatever... why don’t you try and read this book: “the work” by Byron Katie. I think it’s pretty cool and often can help people to see where the “problem” is really coming from. From your head. And then the solution comes its own way. Just a thought...

Oh no, I can’t belive I wrote so much. I really sound like a preacher... Sorry. It all just came to my mind. If you feel offended or bored please feel free to delete it!! no worries!

5:27 am  
Blogger Don said...

I'm knackered... totally shagged after a hard day's work and watching American Idol in the company of half a bottle of Valpolicalla - Rock and roll eh J? Anyway, I've only read the first paragraph or two so I can't comment. Just thought I'd say something in case you felt abandoned. I'll give it a thorough going over tomorrow... the post that is.

7:44 am  
Blogger Justine said...

Hi Die Muräne, thanks so much for your thoughtful and thorough view. I really appreciate your time. Thanks sharing your experience about your sister. I will have a look at that book. You're right about giving it space...
Vielen dank (Engelsken min er mye bedre enn tysken min, også!)

Hi Don, thanks for weighing in mate!

I gather from the nice emails I've been getting that I come across a little bit 'border line' from this post :-)
I just want you to know that if I were speaking this, I would be speaking gently and just explaining main views. Not upset or tense.

7:48 pm  
Blogger Don said...

I demand you replace it. I spent the little time I had available this morning reading it. Now I can feel a comment or two coming on.

3:07 am  
Blogger Chai said...

I dont get it. I cant reconcile the comments so far to the content of this post. Unless you removed it since.
So what was in it?

9:43 am  
Blogger Justine said...

I think it was freaking people out...

Chai you look like you got majorly freaked out this weekend! Cool spaceman, man!

5:47 pm  
Blogger Meow said...

I guess you removed what you originally wrote ... hope all is oK.
Take care, Meow

4:29 pm  
Blogger Justine said...

well, I think I got what I needed to out of this, which was some caring comments and constuctive criticism. Its filed away as a word doc for my future ref.

12:35 am  

Post a Comment

<< Home